So, today I'm going to post a bunch of really bad jokes and maybe even some riddles. Let's get started.
What did the fisherman say to the card magician?
Pick a cod, any cod!
(Okay, I said they were going to be bad, didn't I?)
What's the Internet's favorite animal?
What did the green grape say to the purple grape?
Breathe, idiot! BREATHE!
What bone will a dog never eat?
Why did the gravedigger get promoted?
Because he was bury good.
Which extinct bird liked video games?
I think that's all the bad jokes I have for you, so, now onto some riddles! I won't post the answer to any of the riddles but if you want to know the answers, just let me know in the comments!
What can you catch but not throw?
A man was pushed out of an airplane without a parachute. How did he survive?
Lives without a body, hears without ears, speaks without a mouth, to which the air alone gives birth. What is it?
Riddle #4- A man is in court for killing his wife. In the closing statements the man's lawyer surprises everyone when he announces "His wife was just missing. everyone look at those doors. His wife is going to walk in those doors in about 30 seconds." The entire court is silent and the jury stares at the door as the lawyer and the defendant stare at them. After a couple of minutes the lawyer says "See! If you were so sure he killed his wife, you wouldn't be watching that door!"
The jury go into deliberation and comes back almost immediately with a guilty verdict.
Why did the jury convict him?
Hope you enjoyed this post and let me know in the comments if you think that I should do this again sometime! Also be sure to post what you think is the answer to the riddles down in the comments! I think that's all, bye bye! :)
1. The Lights: I love the Christmas lights, they look amazing at night.
2. The Funny Santa Decorations: I've seen some of Santa at the beach, or in the swimming pool, stuck in a chimney, even one of Santa being chased up a tree to get away from a dog!
3. Charlie the Elf:: We have an "Elf On The Shelf" named Charlie. He recently came back from the North Pole where he was helping Santa watch over kids or that's where my mom said he was. My younger siblings love Charlie and I'll admit, it's fun to find him when I wake up in the morning. (If Ellie doesn't tell me as soon as I walk out my bedroom door)
4. All The Cookies: My grandma loves to make cookies around Christmas, so, she has us kids help her out. After we're done, the house always smells delicious!
5. Everyone Is Happy (Well, almost everyone): I've noticed that most of my family is just happier around Christmas and that makes me happy. It might just be the excitement of getting presents on Christmas morning or it might be because they're spending time with their family...yeah, probably the presents. Even though there are those few people who say they hate Christmas, I know there was a time when they were younger they loved waking up and finding out what Santa had left under the tree for them.
Butterfly: I love butterflies. I love their brightly colored wings and I think they look amazing in pictures. :D
Beanbag Chair: I like beanbag chairs. I've always wanted one but apparently there is not enough room in my room for one. But if I were to ever get one it would be blue.
Books: I love, love, love books. Some of my favorites are The Hunger Games Trilogy, Beautiful Creatures, Ketchup Clouds, How I Lost You, The Fault In Our Stars, The Host, The Twilight Saga, The Gathering, Matched, The House of Night Series, The Percy Jackson Series, The Heroes of Olympus Series, and The Kane Chronicles.
Blue: Blue is my absolute favorite color. I love all shades of blue, but, if I had to pick one, my favorite would be sky blue. :D